Wednesday, April 20, 2011


So I guess rules were made to be broken. In my defense, I left the house at 7:30 Tuesday morning and didn't get back until after 10 that night. I have no excuse for Wednesday though. I'm going to try to start writing posts at night to be published the next morning, which might help- this one handed typing thing makes writing an entry pretty slow.

I've been thinking a lot lately about gender stereotypes and how I want to approach them with Bug. As much as I admire people who are trying to raise their children gender-neutral, I don't feel like that's a viable option for us. On the other hand, I don't want her to feel like there are things she can't/won't do or have because they are 'boy stuff'. And likewise, I would hate to hear her bring down a peer of the opposite gender for playing with 'girl stuff.' And, I won't lie, I really don't want to be one of those households that are all-princess, all the time. I don't want her to be afraid to get muddy and run around and climb trees and throw balls. I would like for her to spend more time in dirty jeans than frilly dresses.

On the other hand, I'm not devoid of girlyness myself. I like to get dressed up and put on makeup that's glittery and paint my nails. I can't imagine that Bug won't notice that and want to be just like me. And for now, while she's tiny and can't make her own wardrobe choices, I do make sure to put her in girl clothes if we're going somewhere that she's likely to be noticed and held a lot by other people. We have a ton of boy hand-me-downs that she wears when we're around the house or running errands, and I'm not afraid to shop in the boys' section at Babies'R'Us but when it comes down to it, I want people to know that she's a girl. I'd like to say that's just to avoid the awkwardness of correcting people, but it's not really. It's because I'm glad to have a daughter, and until she tells me she'd rather not be, I want people to know that she's an adorable little girl.

The other problem with raising a child gender-neutral is that we don't exist in a vacuum. My mother-in-law makes hair bows for a living. There's no way I could stop her from making bows for Bug (or headbands, as pictured) even if I wanted to. And I don't want to stop her, anyway. I like bows. But where is the line between raising a little girl who likes to wear bows, and a little girl who refuses to go out of the house without make-up on? Because honestly, I don't want to cross it.

No comments:

Post a Comment